Saturday, July 10, 2010

I CALL IT HOW I SEE IT


Recently there was an article in the magazine Bitch that I would like to comment about. 

What?

That is the name of the magazine: Bitch.

OK, don't believe me, here.


Anyways…

There was an article in this magazine about relationships and how people are defined by their names. The author of the article, Megan, talks about how in one relationship she found being referred to as "Tom's girlfriend" was demeaning to her. They eventually broke up over the issue. She then had a new boyfriend named Mike. They agreed that they would call each other partners. However, no one around them would accept that title.

Relationships should be built around respect for each other involved. I could never see myself calling my girlfriend the name of that magazine or even worse, one of the Dirty Seven. However, me personally I find the term partner to be rather impersonal. A partner is someone you go into a business with and when it ends, you part ways. The term to me lacks emotion and passion.

Yes, I will agree that in a sense a marriage/relationship is like a partnership in terms of the financial assists but it is a lot more than that.

DISCLAIMER: I am providing my commentary based on what I have seen. Honestly, I cannot really comment on the topic so take it with a grain of salt. Don't use this for actual advice. I only know theory about intimate relationships. I am not a big theory person. Ask my Summer 2010 5W1 Calculus II professor (excellent prof, by the way) when I tried to equate the summation of a series as it approaches infinity and converges to a fixed value to a real life problem.

My math major skills are exposed. I know, over your heads.

Anyways…

Because of the lack of passion in the name partner, that is why I call it as I see it.

If you're a woman/man and you are dating a man, he's your boyfriend. If you're a man/woman and you are dating a woman, she's your girlfriend. If you are a man/woman married to another man, he's your husband. If you are a woman/man married to another woman, she's your wife.

I am not trying to hetro-normalize a relationship (actually my LGBT activist friend agrees with me on this point), but it is my way of recognizing the different types of relationships that are out there and calling them what they are. It is my way of saying your relationship is equal to my relationship with my significant other.

(Uh-oh… This is sounding like another LGBT Rights rant… LOL)

In conclusion, is that not what the whole issue of ANY relationship is be it one of intimacy or among co-workers or close friends? Being treated as you would like to be treated and expect the same in return.

1 comment:

Stacey Langley said...

You already know this, but I had to remind you that you rock.